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. Read the paragraph. I was born in 1992 in Chicago. I moved to New York City when I was 12. I published my first story in my school’s literary journal when I was a freshman. I am now the editor of the school newspaper. I want to study journalism when I am in college. What would be the most effective way to revise this paragraph?

Answer :

ericcaa66

ill help you skip reading that long paragraph answer. the answer is "avoid beginning each sentence with a pronoun"

chaplinway

Answer:

The most effective way to revise this paragraph is to avoid beginning each sentence with the pronoun I.

Explanation:

Starting every sentence in this paragraph with the pronoun "I" does not make it flow like a real narrative it gives the impression of being just sentences together without cohesion, a good revision would be to add connectors to make the transition from line to line and make it work as a whole and unite idea.

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